For fun, I decided to post a parodic adaptation of Dr. James McCaffrey’s terrific article on What Makes A Good Software Tester? Hope you like it.
1. No Passion for Analysis and Testing: The key to being a horrible software tester is to truly hate what you do. A horrible software tester will generally get more satisfaction from playing Plants vs. Zombies than from any sort of testing related activity. This characteristic is often associated with people who don’t have a college degree in a quantitative field such as mathematics, economics or computer science. To a large extent, this disdain for analysis seems to be an innate, rather than acquired, characteristic. They could prove this with numbers, but whatever.
2. Lack of Technical Skill: A horrible software tester must not understand the code they are working with. They probably can’t even spell HTML. Technical skills can be acquired through education and experience – two things a horrible tester will avoid at any cost. On a scale of 1 to 10, a horrible tester must have a score of at least 0.012 in terms of development skills.
3. Limited Cranial Capacity: A horrible software tester must be dumb – really dumb. Like finger-in-a-light-socket dumb. Software development is essentially an exercise in logic, and to operate at a base level in this environment, a software tester simply has to be exceptionally limited in his or her mental capacity.
4. No Ability to Prioritize and Organize: A horrible software must have an extremely short attention…Look at that! A blue car! Software development and testing is a highly dynamic and fluid activity; the key variables can change weekly or even daily. There’s no need for a horrible software tester to recognize, interpret or organize around these frequently changing job environment factors.