I don’t normally post stories about the supernatural here on the uTest blog. That’s really more of an in-the-wild type of topic. But seeing how today is Halloween, I figured what the hell…
This story was sent to me by a tester who recently had a near-death experience. After filing a bug report, he was instructed by the developer to “unplug the computer, and then plug it back in again.” In doing so, he electrocuted himself. Tragic. The lesson here: testers report bugs, they should never try to fix them.
Anyway, while he laid there (technically dead for several minutes) his soul briefly entered the realm of eternal punishment, otherwise known as software testing hell. Here is how he described it:
- All software must be bug-free in IE6
- Your homepage is the blue screen of death
- You can escape hell by reporting one valid bug, unfortunately all bugs are features in software testing hell
- All code is written in the “Boo” programming language and testers are required to be proficient
- Test cases are literally written in stone
- Developers are right about everything and you must laugh at all their jokes
- Testers must work to Eddie Money’s Ready Eddie album for all eternity
- Wi-Fi kicks you off every few minutes and you have to re-enter the password every time
- The Wi-Fi password is 4,000 A’s and a 1
- There’s a shortage of computer mice, so you have to use the track thing on the keyboard
- Agile testing involves dodging knives
- SCRUM meetings involve actual wrestling
- Requirements change by the time you finish reading them
- White box testing is done inside an actual white box
- Mutation testing involves testing with actual mutants (not the cool X Men kind either)
- And in software testing hell, bugs hunt you!
Have you been to software testing hell? Be sure to share your experience in the comments section. Oh, and Happy Halloween!
P.S. – The tester eventually came back to life.